Perhaps it's been long since I really sit down and think, and think.
I am going to write in retroactive mode - since things I remember the recent ones more vividly.
April - May 2009
A miscommunication. "This week" and "next week" are two very distinct concepts, but somehow I managed to mix it up, and fortunately this did not happen at work. But it definitely affected not only myself. Yes it is such a minute incident, but the impact to me is big enough to be remembered.
Partly, I want to attribute to my tiredness, and I do want to attribute my tiredness to working. Yet, I think it really is more on the way I work - perhaps I still always feel that I have not done things good enough yet - I already have that in college. It is truly the case when many people from different background work together on a project, we spent a lot of time - just to clear out misunderstandings so that we can start working.
Tiredness also affected other parts of life - specifically the participation and the enjoyment aspect.
But - when I realize I really did learn quite an amount of things over these 10 months - I feel a little better.
Partly, I also want to attribute to my family project. That also created quite an amount of work and I gave quite some thoughts. In fact, more thoughts were given to it after the Go/No Go decision. This somewhat created a sense of insecurity. For almost 8 months, I enjoyed quite a sense of independence and security, and all in the sudden, I felt like I am exposed to tremendous risk and I just feel that I will somehow regret - years later.
So, all in all, these two months I think I have been too engaged into: Do this, do that, think about this, think about that.
In fact, at this moment - that's all I want to say - and February 2009 was quite a "milestone" - nothing to be glorified, but still should note it - I don't know I will still remember what it is yrs later. - when I don't specify it here
